Doula Interview 3: LM

Doula #3 was rather early for our meeting, which we appreciated after our interview with her because it gave us the opportunity to grab a quick lunch before Doula #4.

LM was a pierced and tattooed young woman who was trained at the local, highly regarded doula educational center and is also a student midwife. She has made the decision to not become DONA certified because it would limit her from using some of the resources she likes to employ during the birth experience, such as the use of essential oils.

Positive impressions:
LM has attended many births, though not as many as Doula #2, and has attended a wide-array of workshops. She spoke a lot about the mind-body connection and about ways to quiet anxieties and fears during the birth experience. During the course of our meeting with her, she provided us with a long list of books we can read for additional birth-related information, which indicated to me that she is very knowledgeable and has a large network of resources for her clients’ benefit. She led the conversation and was confident, but wasn’t as wordy as Doula #2. K and I were very impressed with LM’s knowledge about gender fluidity and her personal experiences with many transgender friends. She seems like she would be a tough advocate, if needed, and would provide a great level of support to us during the birth experience.

She is the crunchiest of all doulas we’ve interviewed so far. Honestly, after referencing that she has a friend named Moonbeam, I felt like she seemed a lot like the doula stereotype I had going into this process. She spoke a lot about the use of herbal supplements, which made me somewhat fearful that she could potentially assume what path we’d prefer in a given situation. Since I am already defensive about our plan to formula feed Falco, I was irritated that she mentioned that she could refer us to the local breast milk bank when I indicated that I did not wish to induce lactation to feed our baby.

Comfort: 4.5 stars
Experience: 4.5 stars
Inclusion of Partner: 5 stars
Personality: 4 stars


4 thoughts on “Doula Interview 3: LM

  1. I remember being very irritated when people implied I really should induce lactation when my partner was pregnant (and this from someone who successfully later nagged my partner to do so for our second…). I’m guessing you both will be fending off plenty of “well-meaning” advice on that front. Perhaps you can consider this good practice… (otherwise, a gender-savvy doula sounds potentially really nice).

    • Well said. I think at a certain point, I’ll get over being sensitive about it because I’ll know that I’m feeding my kid in the way that makes sense for us. I just don’t feel comfortable inducing lactation because I have a lot of medical conditions that require medication. In order to feel really comfortable breastfeeding Falco, I’d need to forgo that medication, and that just isn’t healthy for me. Also, as someone who is admittedly rather OCD, I don’t feel all that comfortable using breastmilk from someone I don’t know. K and I just feel like formula feeding is the best solution for us.

      We have more doula reviews headed your way in the coming days (we even have another interview tonight – whew!), and hopefully we can make/share our decision soon. Right now, we’re grappling with whether someone’s gender expertise, birth expertise and/or our overall feeling of comfort with them matters most. It’s so damn hard!

      • I hope you could tell my intent was definitely not to ask you defend a feeding decision. My assumption was you both were totally on it (which you are of course, and it sounds like a good decision all round).

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