The journey to become pregnant for the first time has been a roller coaster for the past 9 months. Since we started our blog just recently, I thought I would share some of the highlights month-by-month to tell the story of how we got to this place.
Took my final shot of testosterone on December 23, 2011. C and I talked constantly about baby making and our plans for 2012!
Started charting with Fertility Friend and felt obsessed and empowered by all of my bodily data. We also began researching sperm donors and narrowed down our choices to our top 2 or 3. Our friends tease us about a Google spreadsheet we created to track pros and cons of each donor option.
Still waiting for my cycle to return. Waiting and waiting, and was getting scared that it would never come back. On Valentine’s Day, I went to my regular OB/GYN and discussed my plans for getting pregnant. The doctor and nurse practitioner are excited for C and I and are more than willing to work with us for my pregnancy. C teased me about showing my bits some love on V Day.
March 4 2012–my period returned. I was overjoyed and grouchy at the same time.
We also had our first consults with reproductive endocrinologists (RE) this month. We selected one RE based on the fact that they advertised in a LGBT local paper and the other based on good word-of-mouth feedback. Before scheduling the appointments, C and I drafted long, detailed letters explaining our situation and identities. They both sent me 30-40 page packets of forms to complete ahead of time, most of which I had to respond with “does not apply.”
The prices were really somewhat shocking, especially that of Dr. W, which were about $750 more per cycle than Dr. MB.
We both felt really excited about going with Dr. MB between his better pricing and REALLY compassionate and nerdy personality. This is somewhat surprising because we both anticipated liking Dr. W more, based on some good experiences we’d previously had with her staff. However, she seemed very judgmental toward C. For example, when I asked directly how queer/trans friendly she was, she responded, “I’m sitting here talking to you, aren’t I?” Ummmmm….What?!
Looking back, I can honestly say that we couldn’t have made a better choice. Dr. MB’s staff are so kind and I feel very relaxed and safe at their practice.
First month of testing at the RE’s office. I was introduced to the
joy horror of the cycle day 3 vaginal ultrasound. If I had any issues with being a bleeding man, I was going to have to get over them quickly. We also had tons of blood work to check hormones, thyroid, FSH, and a bunch of other things. I had a HSG, which is uncomfortable both physically and emotionally, as it turns out the resident performing the test was in my degree program and remembers me—-as a different gender. At the end of the testing cycle, we met with the RE who diagnosed me with Hashimoto’s and refers to me another endocrinologist. Other than my slightly elevated thyroid, all other systems were a go.
I was disappointed because I was hoping May would be our first month to try. Instead, I met with the new endocrinologist, Dr. B. He’s young and did his residency at the medical school where I do research. Somehow this makes him more approachable. He prescribed synthroid and wanted to see my TSH levels below 2 before we began trying to get pregnant.
C and I took a trip to Philly to visit our best friends and attend the Trans Health Conference. We attended a half-day intensive workshop on trans-masculine pregnancy and it was amazing! I was still charting this month and also practicing with ovulation predictor kits (OPKs). While on the drive to Philly, we stopped somewhere on the Ohio turnpike so I could pee on a stick. I got one of my first smiley faces in a men’s public restroom!
My thyroid levels were good and were finally ready to start trying! This month, we had our first IUI attempt. We decided to try one natural (un-medicated) cycle. We did OPKs and went in for back-to-back (24 hours apart) IUIs once we received a positive OPK result. The first IUI went great, but the second one was physically and emotionally uncomfortable. We had a nurse we didn’t like as much, she mis-gendered me and spoke about me in the 3rd person. Plus, she had difficulty inserting the catheter through my cervix and I had a lot of bleeding, camping, and backaches afterward.
We tested after 2 weeks and a got a very faint positive. After going in for blood work we discovered my HCG (beta) had dropped and I wasn’t pregnant after all. I was unprepared for how crushed and disappointed I would feel.
Because I don’t want to be off T for longer than I have to, and was hoping to be hugely pregnant during the winter months, we decided to move ahead with a medicated cycle for our second attempt. Doing the medicated and monitored cycle made me feel like we were at the doctor’s office every other day (and we were for two of the weeks). I did a baseline ultrasound and blood work, took Femara, did 4 or 5 additional ultrasounds (with blood work each time) to check on how my follicles were growing. We ended up with two mature follicles and did a trigger shot of Ovidrel to initiate ovulation. Again, we went in for back-to-back IUIs, 24 hours apart. 4 days later, I had another follow-up appointment to confirm ovulation. Two weeks after taking the Ovidrel shot, we got our good news! 🙂