Things WERE going well

I thought that K was easily transitioning into the ease of second trimester. Nausea and exhaustion was becoming a thankful thing of the past. He was no longer running to the restroom every five minutes with a screaming bladder that was demanding his attention. I was looking forward to eating dinner together again and spent a near mint on groceries for the upcoming week.

Then, last night, while I was cheerfully preparing one of my favorite fall meals, spaghetti squash with marinara, sautéed peppers, mushrooms and Italian chicken sausage, I heard K make a beeline from our bedroom to the bathroom. A fraction of a second later, I heard the poor guy throwing up. He’d taken a lovely Sunday afternoon nap, likely went a wee bit too long between snacks, and awoke with a terrible migraine and nausea.

I, of course, knocked on the door and asked if I could do anything or fetch him water, and he said no. Whenever he feels sick, especially throughout his pregnancy so far, I feel so darn helpless. I would do literally anything to absorb the morning sickness to give him a break. I just wish there was something I could DO!

One of our kitties knew just what to do to lift our spirits. I spotted him curled into a tiny ball in the bassinet my dad had made for be as a baby. Even a very green K cracked a smile. Hopefully, kitty will bring a smile to your face, too.

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9 weeks

Well, I’ve hit the 9 week mark!

Here’s an update about how I’m feeling:  I’m not feeling 100% like myself, but I know things could be much worse during the first trimester.

I get tired pretty quickly, even doing little things like walking the dog or doing dishes.

Certain smells make me gag (literally).  Mostly it’s just garlic and vinegar.  I felt really bad for the woman re-heating her garlicky pasta in the microwave today at work.  I was in the kitchen grabbing my lunch from the fridge and audibly heaved a little.  I hope I didn’t offend her—really it’s me and not your pasta.

The frequent urination has been getting a little better.  I’m only going to the bathroom 14 times a day instead of 20 (true story).  The commute is usually where I get in trouble.  It’s exactly an hour one way, and I usually pee once an hour.  I race into work and head right for the bathroom!  I’m really concerned about this winter though when the snow and rough conditions can make the commute even longer.  I hope this gets better or I’m going to have to get creative.

Finally, I have what I’ll call evening sickness.  Most other pregnant people feel better at night, but my nausea is worse between 5-8pm.  I never want to eat dinner.  This has been hard because C and I usually like to prepare and eat dinner together.  It makes me feel sad that we don’t do that much anymore.  I’m lucky if I can eat some crackers or soup or a smoothie or a Popsicle or something.  It’s not that I’m not eating….I’m eating more in the morning and afternoon when I feel better.  But, my major complaint thus far is missing eating and cooking dinner with my wife!

Here’s an update about what’s coming up next week: Next week is a big and busy week full of doctors’ appointments.

On Monday I’m headed to the Endocrinologist to see how my thyroid is doing while pregnant.  While we were trying to conceive, I was diagnosed with Hashimotos.  From what I understand I’ll go to this endo once a month to get my levels checked to make sure I’m on the right does of Synthroid throughout the pregnancy.

Wednesday, we have our second ultrasound with the RE’s office.  If all goes well this will be our final interaction with them, and we will officially “graduate” to our next care provider (OB).

Friday morning is our first OB appointment with Dr. K.  I’m nervous and excited.  I feel so comfortable at the RE’s office and now we have to get comfy at the new place.  I’ve had good experience receiving gyno care there as a transman, however pregnancy will likely be a challenge to their staff.  All the providers at the office I spoke with said they were 100% supportive, let’s just hope they act on their words.

Sh*t my pregnant husband says

Since this is a semi-anonymous blog and K is far too busy with work and growing a human in his belleh to post very frequently, you likely aren’t aware that his charm and humor comes mostly when he isn’t trying to be humorous or charming. He gets a lot of zingers out when he’s just… talking.

He is constantly rolling his eyes at me lately because I am so obsessed with the tiny, adorable outfits at Old Navy or, worse yet, Zulily. I’ve been trying to restrain myself and not purchase things that aren’t total necessities at this point, but it’s been very difficult. The other day, while chatting with him about the must-have brown and cream striped hoodies I saw online, K said the following:

“Just to spite all your adorable clothing purchases, our child is going to be a nudist.”

It’s likely true. As a small child, K would hide under tables at weddings and emerge naked. I’m sure it’s because he didn’t want to wear those frilly dresses his mom forced him to parade around in, but hey. Being a future nudist is technically in Falco’s DNA.

Later that evening, when discussing all of the work I had done to set up interviews with doula candidates (more on that in a future post, k?), I mentioned to him that some of the women provide placenta encapsulation as an additional service. For those who aren’t aware, placenta encapsulation involves the processing of one’s placenta into capsules that you can take. The theory behind consuming one’s placenta is that it:

• Contains lots of nutrients and hormones
• Can help to balance your hormones and eliminate postpartum depression
• Can increase energy
• Can reduce your postpartum healing time
• Can increase your milk supply
• Can reduce symptoms at menopause

As I droned on and on about placenta encapsulation, I glanced over at K, who was growing greener by the second. He said:

“Hon, can we please wait until after my first trimester to talk about placenta encapsulation?”

The poor guy was going to barf. I quickly dropped it.

It’s gems like this, dear readers, that brighten my life. In what ways do your partners unintentionally bring you joy?

Overscheduled and overwhelmed

I feel so terribly guilty complaining about how exhausted I am, when I’m not the one with hormones coursing through my veins and every ounce of energy devoted to growing a wee person’s vital organs. That being said, I am CRISPY! Things at work are really quite hectic these days and when I glance at our upcoming weekends, all I see are booked-solid commitments until mid-October, leaving very little down-time for decompression. I even ended up canceling plans with our dearest friends last night, just so I could try to get caught up on some rest.

I feel like K thinks he’s mostly so drained from Falco, but I can’t imagine that all of our social commitments are really helping matters. We’re more scheduled now than we were throughout our entire spring and summer! When we get home after a long day of work, we look at each other, know we should do a chore or two, and then end up collapsing on the couch. Worse yet is that K’s “morning” sickness mostly hits him during the late afternoon and early evening, making him completely disinterested in dinner. These days, since dinner isn’t a time for familial bonding, we grab whatever sounds good (or in K’s case, least gross) to us before making our way to the couch, where we pretty much stay for the remainder of the night, save for human or canine bodily needs.

How do you find ways to destress as a family?

6 Weeks 6 Days

My lovely wife has been posting up a storm and I love reading her writing.  I’ve been feeling good for the most part, and experiencing a few first trimester symptoms–fatigue, frequent urination, and a little morning sickness.

I swear, every time I walk past a urinal, I’m instantly nauseous.  And the building I work in is pretty nice and new and the men’s rooms are usually clean.  I shudder to think about less cleanly options like rest stops or gas stations.  Aggggg.

I think I could file this under pregnant man problems.